Pro obesity campaigners target McDonalds salads

mcdonalds-signLondon, UK- The only healthy alternative at McDonalds- apart from the dirt found on their floors- has been savaged by an online group known as ‘prOBESITY’, its users who have to be clinically obese to join, have condemned the McDonalds salad for ‘not containing ebough calories’. Leader of prOBESITY and professional eater Greg Wallace, spoke out over the groups recent condemnation of the fast foot outlet, “We here at OBESE are usually big fans of McDonalds, especially their Big Tasty burger which tips the scale at 1000 calories a portion and the Big Mac Burger which is a similar size. However it has recently come to our attention that McDonalds are now ‘Lite-ing’ their menu in order to make it less fatty and calorific, this is completely unacceptable.” The McDonalds salad has around 150 calories and can be enjoyed with either a portion of grilled or crispy chicken, although even fat soaked chicken isn’t enough to satisfy 450 pound Greg, who claimed to have once beat anorexia. “All of our members are professionally obese, no one in this group weighs less than 400 pounds, do you think a teeny salad with a bit of chicken is going to curb our appetites? Most of us are allergic to salad. Well be protesting outside the entrance of the store on Oxford Street London, it’ll only take two of us to block it.” The store manager of Oxford Street McDonalds was well aware of prOBESITY’s call to action, he wished to remain anonymous for fear of retaliation but did say “If they come here we’ll be ready, we’re going to throw burgers down the road, hopefully their fat asses will hobble on down away from the store to chase them.”