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World

Santa takes dumps down Naughty Listers chimneys

December 25, 2016

THOUSANDS of children were distraught today after waking up to find a steaming pile of turd in their living rooms, instead of the presents they so desperately wanted. Father Christmas has had to take ‘extraordinary […]

Science & Technology

Brussel sprouts still commited to climate change

December 24, 2016

THEY’RE almost impossible to feed to kids, and also some adults too, they taste like a fart and have the texture of a used newspaper. They’re possibly the most disgusting vegetable known to mankind, and […]

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Science & Technology

Quick Google search diagnoses man with cancer

December 22, 2016

GOOGLE, the go to place for all of the worlds questions, a wealth of knowledge and an bastion of anxiety. One man in particular has not faired well in his quest for diagnosis through a […]

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Business

Panic over Christmas dwarf shortage

December 22, 2016

CHRISTMAS pantos and and pop up Santa’s Grottos are said to be in “deep trouble” this festive season after a national shortage of dwarves. Dwarves are said to be rejecting the traditional roles of shorter […]

World

Trump announces plan to build Death Star

December 21, 2016

PRESIDENT elect Donald Trump has today has announced his plans to militarise space today by building the worlds first Death Star. The plan was originally leaked by a White House official, forcing The Donald as […]

Science & Technology

Scientists reveal dinosaurs died out in ancient world war

December 19, 2016

IT seems almost incomprehensible, for years scientists have told the masses that the Dinosaurs were a rather plucky set of species, easily adapting to their environment and thriving for millions of years until they come to […]