Trump to decide on policies by game of ‘Rock, Paper, Grab her by the Pussy’

PRESIDENT elect Mr Donald Trump has made another announcement today, this time regarding how he will make his executive decisions during his tenure as President.

Mr Trump has told reporters that instead of putting any thought into his policies at all, he will simply decide on the future of the United States through a simple change to one of the nations favourite games of chance Rock, Paper, Scissors.

Trump has labelled his new game ‘Rock, Paper, Grab her by the Pussy.’ And the general rules are the same, except one must make a grabbing motion instead of a scissoring one.

He said, outside Trump Tower in New York. “I’ve come to tell you all that I’m not gonna make any judgements in policies because you all know I’m not a politician. So I’m going to leave it up to chance.”

“I’ve created a new game, probably the best game that’s ever made, its called ‘Rock, Paper, Grab her by the Pussy. And the rules are simple.”

“Paper beats Rock, Grab em by the Pussy beats Paper, and Rock beats grabbing em by the Pussy. Its simple, yet effective. This will be my way of determining my presidency. Decisions on the Affordable Care Act, Rock, Paper, Grab her by the Pussy, pressing the nuclear button, you guessed it, Grab her by the Pussy.”

Trump continued to show the crowd outside his home how to play his new creation, something most of them seemed to pick up easily.

One man shouted “Thanks Donald, now I know what to to do about my wife’s abortion, grab her by the pussy.”