Cat practising to become masseuse

A CAT is about to become the first feline in history to earn a qualification in massage therapy, allowing it to become a fully fledged masseuse.

Tina, an orange and Black Calico has been practicing her kneading ‘Almost everyday’ for the past 5 years. Owner Jerry Faulks from Northampton has been helping her by allowing Tina to massage him whenever she pleases.

“She’s good.” Jerry said confidently. “When she first started kneading I was like, what the hell is she doing. She was on top of me one day and just started pushing her paws into my stomach. She didn’t seem to know what she was doing at first but then she really got into it and so did I.”

“As soon as she told me she wanted to go professional  I supported her all the way, I rang a local Massage Parlour who agreed to give Tina a two week trial.”

Tina ‘Absolutely Smashed’ her trial and was soon employed part time at another parlour for trainees after being referred by the parlours owner. Working 2 days a week and sleeping for the rest of when not at college. However, despite her constant cat napping Tina has come top of her class, out- performing even her human college mates.

“I’m so proud of her.” Said Jerry, who has all the hallmarks of an over-bearing parent. “I think she wants to go on to become one of those celebrity masseuse, oh massaging the stars, wouldn’t that be great.”

When asked what she thought of her achievement, Tina said “Meow.”