DONALD Trump has announced to the world that all future Executive Orders, including after he leaves office, will have to have 140 characters or less, so he can tweet them on Twitter.
Instead of asking Twitter to up their character limit or posting them elsewhere, Trump has said that it is ‘Entire possible’ to fit hundreds of pages of legislation into just under 150 characters.
“I’m fed up of having to tweet multiple details about executive this, executive that. It’s boring you know. So in line with my smaller government policy, I’m going to get rid of all of the jargon. What you see on Twitter is what you get.”
“Take this for example, ‘Enforcing Federal Law with Respect to Transnational Criminal Organizations and Preventing International Trafficking’ 125 characters fits in very neatly. Yes there won’t be anything else to it but it’s pretty self explanatory if you ask me.”
Having had is 140 character rule being described as ‘Vague’ and ‘Very unassuming’ Trump did his best to address those that were still unconvinced.
“All of my Orders will be written in plain English and if you can’t understand that, then you’re obviously not as bright as I am.”
“Also, rest assured I will still be sitting in the Oval office at the presidential desk and have all of those people standing by gawping idly at me when I type these things into my phone.”