Bible confirmed as worlds oldest source of fake news

FAKE news has been in the news quite alot recently, from stories alleging the existence of aliens on the Moon to articles inferring the size of Donald Trumps penis, ‘I guarantee you there’s no problem. I guarantee.’, he said, regarding that one.

But, now scientists working on the origins of fake news have reveal the earliest source know, and it turns out it may have completely fucked up the world more than we could imagine.

“The Bible.”, said Klaus Anderson of Stockholm University. “The Bible is where it all started. This book is the origin of all fake news and the oldest printed source we have.”

“Modern day media outlets are acting all surprised like fake news is a new thing, but it all started two thousand years ago with a fake Jew named Jesus F Christ.”

“Cast yourselves back to when he walked in water, fed thousands with a tiny piece of bread and turned water into wine. Did he really do those things? No, he was just after Google AdSense money.”

And according to Klaus that is exactly what he got, his fake news stories continue to be believed even to this day, “His fake news has indoctrinated billions and has even led to other fake news outlets such as the Qu’ran and the Book of Mormon.”