Pick a fucking day for Easter and stick to it says everyone

Brits are becoming increasingly ‘Peed off’ and ‘Miffed’ at Easter not being on a set date, it has emerged.

Unlike invariably static celebrations such as birthdays, Christmas, Halloween and Bonfire Night. Easter can’t seem to make up it’s fucking mind on what day to pick, with each year being as much as fourteen days away from the previous date, the only rule is that it must fall on a Sunday.

We took to the streets of the capital to see what Londoners thought of the whole charade.

Jane 27, from Barnet:

“I heard it’s something to do with the path of the semilunar eclipse, doesn’t it have to rotate on an epidural giving a colon enema then the results give us the day of Easter?”

Mohammed 35, Tower Hamlets:

“I don’t celebrate Easter.”

Celeste 19, Wimbledon:

“I wish they would choose a date and stick to it, just like the Romans stuck Jesus to the cross.”

Jonathan 30, Highbury:

“I can’t even remember birthdays and they don’t move, how am I supposed to fucking remember Easter?”

James 7, Camden Town:

“Who cares, as long as I get my fucking Easter eggs.”

We’ll there it is, conclusive proof that Easter needs to be on the same day every year.